Keeping Modesty Cool

May 02, 2015

In the article “Redefining Sexy” from Darling Magazine, one man simply says, “As a man, I’m more attracted to a woman who knows how to dress for her body type in a modest, confident, and classy way, as opposed to simply showing a lot of skin and wearing tight clothes. Something is beautifully intimidating about a girl like this. It’s almost as if there is an unspoken mystery in her modesty, and the pursuer in me comes alive around her. I know that she respects herself by the way she dresses and carries herself, so I am challenged to treat her with the same respect.”

Recently, I have contemplated and reevaluated the reason that I stand for modesty. I think that this mainly stems from the fact that next week, my first year of college will come to a close. What I’ve found is that spending time at my university has only solidified my belief and support of modest dress. I truly believe that the respect that I receive from both male and female students and professors directly correlates to the way I dress.

One problem with our culture is that it is over-sexualized. I’m sure you have heard the phrase “Sex sells,” and unfortunately, it’s true. Yet when we throw modesty to the curb, we as women allow ourselves to be viewed as nothing more than objects. Instead of being forces to be reckoned with, we become something to lust after — nothing more.

What about modesty?

I feel like the word often has a negative connotation. But why? What is it about that word that makes some cringe?  Modesty is a way to express our inner sentiments in an outward way. How we present ourselves in our appearance is a reflection of our heart’s condition. What we wear is a reflection of who we are and how we feel about ourselves.

Keeping Modesty Cool | She's Intentional

One of the biggest misconceptions about modesty is that it’s a woman’s attempt to hide her body. Many people are under the impression that those who choose to dress modestly are ashamed of their bodies and thus feel the need to hide them. However, what I have found is that choosing to dress modestly gives me a confidence and a freedom to express my thoughts without the fear that they will be disregarded or dismissed. And what I mean by that is this: When you dress modestly, your thoughts, ideas, and opinions are more likely to be respected and accepted. If you demonstrate that you have self-respect through your appearance, you are then much more apt to receive respect in return. When you dress modestly, people are not focused on your exposed body, but instead on the words, ideas, and opinions that YOU as a woman have to offer.

Modesty is a mystery. I always want to be an enigma — because that’s cool! When we as women leave everything out on display, there’s no mystery. I want people to wonder about me. I want people to see a recognizable difference in me and wonder about that. Because honestly, being different is cool. Why would you want to be like every other girl? Hundreds of thousands of other girls sport leggings and crop tops on a regular basis. And the problem is that when we try to fit in with everyone else, we lose part of our special God-given uniqueness.

Being modest doesn’t mean that we always wear baggy jean skirts, tennis shoes, and sweatshirts. If this is our definition of modesty, then it’s no wonder so many women shy away from the ideals of modesty. This is the main reason that I am endeavoring to keep modesty “cool.” Because it’s cool to be different!

I love fashion. I love exquisite designers. I love the smell of genuine leather. I am a major advocate of personal style. I truly believe that what you wear is a reflection of who you are on the inside. And I truly feel that modesty should reflect that. Dressing modestly doesn’t have to be frumpy and boring. You can showcase your personality and your personal style in a way that will bring you joy while simultaneously giving glory to God.

Modesty is beautiful. There is such beauty in a woman who knows her worth in Christ and does not need validation from others. Present yourself in a way that makes other people want to dress modestly, too. It’s time to start making modesty cool again. With modesty comes a confidence that will make you truly shine from the inside out. Embrace different. Modesty is cool. Keep it that way.