It’s a personal thing.
Your romance with Jesus, that is.
Something personal is defined as “belonging to a particular person rather than anyone else.” A relationship that you have with any individual is personal — your relationship with your mother is not the same as it is with a childhood friend, they are different. Distinct. Characterized specifically by the bond that you two share.
Think about a relationship you have with a friend, significant other, spouse, parent or sibling. You cultivate an active relationship with that individual by spending time together, conversing, and learning about each other’s interests, hobbies, passions and goals.
Would it not then, make sense to cultivate a relationship with Jesus Christ in the same manner? The way that we interact with Him should be unique only to Him. G.K. Chesterton, theologian and Biblical scholar, stated that “romance is the deepest thing in life; it is even deeper than reality.”
I am sure that many of you would agree with that statement. We grow up from little girls who mimicked women in our life by playing house, dress-up, baby dolls and Barbie dolls into women who desire to be loved, wanted and made beautiful. From the earliest stages of memory, we craved romance, love, passion.
As females, one of our greatest desires is to be romanced: to give love and to be loved. We have discovered that romance with another human being is beautiful, tantalizing, exhilarating. We chase after this desire in nearly every aspect of life. We read romance novels, daydream for hours of weddings, plan the very smallest details of an outfit to be worn on dates. Our hearts cry out for romance, love, and the desire to be wanted. We were created to be a helpmeet to man, and no amount of career goals, finding joy in singleness, cultural feminism or man-bashing will ever take that desire away. But what if we pursued romance with Jesus as often and intently as we pursue romance with a young man?
The church is often referred to as the Bride of Christ (Ephesians 5:21-33); we were created to serve, honor, and reverence Him, yes, but more than that, we were created to love Him. To have a uniquely special bond with Him. He pursued us, as a man pursues a woman to love, when He robed Himself in flesh and came to earth. He did not come into a sinful, hateful world just to experience life in human form — He came because He loved us so much that He wanted to protect and save us from sin so that we could live in eternity together.
Therefore, as women of faith, purpose and specific intentionality, our goal should be to have a personal romance with Jesus and return His affections.
You have captivated my heart, my sister, my bride; you have captivated my heart with one glance of your eyes, with one jewel of your necklace.” {Song of Solomon 4:9 ESV}
Yet in spite of this longing to be loved for who we are in the deepest part of our being, we often feel inadequate of receiving love not only from another human but also from the One who gave us life. Somewhere along the way, hearts have been wounded, dreams have faded, and we don’t feel worthy of that romance any longer. We feel “an underlying, gut feeling of being not enough but too much at the same time.” {Captivating, John & Stasi Eldridge}
But if you realize your beauty, worth and captivating self can be made whole through Christ, you will see that His romance really is the deepest thing in life; that His love brings complete wholeness and beauty as the glory within you shines. You may not feel worthy of His love, but just know that you are what He desires. He wants your heart. He wants to be the One that makes your pulse race, your eyes light up, and fulfill your dreams. He wants to be the One that you long to talk to, spend time with, and pursue.
My beloved speaks and says to me: ‘Arise, my love, my beautiful one, and come away,
for behold, the winter is past; the rain is over and gone…Arise, my love, my beautiful one, and come away.'” {Song of Solomon 2:10-11 & 13 ESV}
When we can understand that romance is not only beautiful when shared with another human being, but that romance was created to bring together Christ and His creation, then will we experience true love. We will experience life as never before, and we will find joy and purpose in our relationship with Jesus.